Strange Days

wow -- i hope she is feeling better ..

I guess you can look at her telling you that as a sign that she was reaching out to you. Now you at least know to keep closer tabs on her until she can move to be with you.

I think writing her a letter is a fine way to start. It's something tangible that she can look at again and again if she starts feeling bad once more, moreso than just telling her over the phone.

I sincerely hope you'll both pull through what is surely an impossible time.

Wow, Chase, having never been confronted with such a situation I don't know what I would do or what I could say but I do know that I would try at the very least to appeal to her to let her know that suicide is not and never will be the answer.

Girl, good looking out on the letter. Send her cards, flowers, balloons, anything that she can look on and know that she is loved, wanted, and important enough to stick around.

Have you spoken to a professional who deals with suicide prevention to find out what road to take? Get your Google on, too, I'm sure there are a plethora of online resources.

You both are in my prayers.

wow I wouldn't know what to do if I was in your shoes. I hope and pray that all goes well with your sister.

I'm so sorry, it's never easy hearing things like that from people you love--anyone really. The best thing you can do is reassure that person that things are alright, that they will get better and that nothing is as bad as it seems. Speaking from personal experience, a lot of the time, they just want to know they'd be missed, and that they are loved by someone, anyone out there.
It's best to let het talk about it when she feels she is ready, but always be there, just in case that moment is soon.
And it will never be anyones fault that anyone else commited suicide, trust me. You may feel that way, but the last thing I would want to do (if I had gone through with it) was make another human being feel miserable.
Just make sure she knows she is loved, that she has so much time left, a lot of life to live and that things can always change, improve if need be.
I hope to [some god] I helped, even a little, and give her my best regards,
Johnny V.

I don't know what to say Chase. The letter was a good idea. I'll pray for yall, I'll pray for her. Maybe, since Butta talks about professional help, you can IM/chat with Deborah Serani since she knows much about depression. Maybe she could help you and give good advice.

I'm so sorry. :(

Chase this is the point where you have to bring a professional in to speak to your sister NOW. Unless this seems to be just temporary depression you have to work with it right now before it's too late. I suggest taking your sister to a counselor or check her medical insurance to see if it provides free services for psychiatrists. If not, try your local community centers. They often have people or can refer you to people you can talk to. The trick is to show your sister you love her and stress that you will go with her. Go with her, Chase. This will not only help her not feel so alone but you being with her can help her make this step. Sometimes, with women especially we go through such emotional changes that you'd need someone trained to analyze what's going on. Believe me, I know what I speak of. Also, you can try online groups. There are some great online groups and organizations with message boards for people who are going through things to post if your sister would rather do it this way. At this point find anyone who can help your sister and the most you can do is be there for her and hope that it is enough. I wish you and your sister the best. I hope she comes through this.

Everyone left pratical advice and covered just about everything, but I do want to add, no matter what happens, it's NOT your fault. You can't live her life for her or cause her to live or die. You can be just what you are, a loving sister who's going to do whatever it takes to help. I know you're scared for her and I would be, too. I have you in my prayers *HUGS*

I know exactly how you feel. In 2000 my baby sister was diagnosed manic depressive and after the pain of seeing her have a paranoid episode, with which she ended up hospitalized in a mental institution for about a month, she then fell into the pits of depression. She has three beautiful daughters and even though when her brain is functioning normally she lives only for these girls, when she was depressed she did not want to live. Not a reflection of her mothering skills, but a symptom of depresssion. Please get your sister help. You can't force her into therapy, but you can be the one who suggests it very strongly to her.

Also, you did not abandon her and whatever choices she makes are not your fault. Women, I too, tend to take responsibility for other people's actions. It is not your fault.

A big hug to you!

I came here hoping for some normalcy out of my blah days and find this....hmmm..I agree with the others as well, send flowers, yummy fudge brownies (if not her, then me:) ) letters, pictures, etc so that she knows she is loved. I agree though, with kids, we have to be strong not only for ourselves but for them as well, so we end up with the short stick to deal with crap. You could also give her a day away from the kids and family, like an hour of spa treatment, etc? Guess I'm thinking along the lines of what I want LOL! :) Okay, I have to seriously stop laughing at times like these though it's my own medicine. Let her know that she is loved, not only by you, but even by us who have never met her. :)

Chase,

Odd. My brother just recently sent me a suicide page with someone's brains blown out. And he has been talking about it. I think that it is very important to take what someone says very seriously. I have known a few people who killed themselves. I can't stand when someone says, "Oh they are just trying to get attention" I believe that is so far from the true depth of the matter. Heck yeah...they need attention. They need love, they need someone to reach deep down past all the bull crap and pull their good to the surface. I have called my brother like every day since he started that, so i could make sure he is ok. It just seems like there is so much hurt all over the world now. And I think it is great that you are taking your sister seriously. I think some people actually follow through with killing themselves just so they can show everyone who acted so nonchalent about it, that they really do have feelings and that they really can follow through with what they say. You have been a source of inspiration just by reading through your posts and I just want you to know that. Hang in there. And I hope your sister will soon find what she needs to keep going. Anna

Agree Anna, as well...some it is for a cry for help, others actually commit it because of lack of the response that they are looking for...

{{{{{ Chase}}} hugs for u. Please let us know how your sister is doing when you get chance. I hope she is doing ok. Reading this sent chills and flashbacks through me.

I hope things are better for your sister. Just pray for her and do your best to be an ear for her.

best regards, nice info
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